recycled post: Ryan out!

No it’s not the popular (or once popular) exit line used by the host of the famed American Idol, and this post is not about it either.

Last night, I was in the gloomed-mode on a typical desolate Friday night when I started texting practically everyone on my phonebook just to not fall further into the void. And lucky one replied, so I thought.

Ryan, in his usual Ms. Sunshine (ironic why I termed him this) way, replied in glee. By the way, Ryan and I were classmates’ way back in college. So there we were, exchanging nonsense when he urged me to ask him personal questions. That point on, I know he is leading me to the question he I find ill at ease to ask. I didn’t really mustered the courage to ask directly do I cruise it to “plans of settling down” queery, i meant querywhich he casually answered, “..kung pwede na magpakasal ng same gende sa bansa.” (when same gender marriage is made possible in the country). I was speechless. Priceless! Crown, sash, scepter and flower please.. we have a new queen in the house!

I know! I didn’t expect it’d be that fast and casual. I mean even I can’t pull it off. My hat’s off to Ryan for braving to come out and for trusting me. I know it all along and I’m sure he has the same feeling about me which figure why he didn’t hesitate to tell me.

So what happened after his revelation? He did catch me off guarded. I didn’t know what to reply. I played dumb-fonded, like how a straight guy would react. I know he didn’t buy it but that fended off his turning around the table. Unfair as it would appear but I don’t find the necessity to come out to him just because he came out to me. That’s stupid. And awkward. But I am not dismissing the thought of letting him know. Maybe not now, but in the future.

I’m always here Ryan if you need tips and stuff, which I know you don’t but still I am here. Who else will be there for one another. Spread the love and color the town pink sistah!